Summing up this day…5 December 2008 (Only till school time)

0545 Jaago Re
0600 Subah Colgate ki toh din tumhara
0710 Its Motu’s birthday
0715 Smile please
0740 13 present. It’s Friday today. (Something should happen)
0755 (some sound) Sir asks whose mobile was that?
Yours
Mine is silent
So is ours
0800 Surrender your gadgets and toys
We dont have anything
We’re bored. Meh
0945 Nowhere to go
1029 We’re back after lunch.
Pack your bags, you all are going home. I’ve called up your parents.
Jabardasti?
Why have you come to school? For bunking?
Silence
1034 Haris looks pale
1115 Joyita wants some coffee. Leaves us alone. We rejoice
Comes back. Meh
1130 Mr M is with Miss B. Pushed inside girls’ washroom.
Fights back. Comes outside.
1133 Goes back again. Mr N with him ( sher bankar ghus gaye andar). Miss B already in.
Door locked. Threesome (wink)
1135 Mr K comes wielding his mobile. Smile please
1135 Mr N poses. Mr M gives thumbs-up
1136 Old hag comes outside her class. Mobile, girl, boys, loo. Adds 2+2+2=222.  MMS???
1138 Brings another hag with her. Mr K is in trouble. Refuses to hand over his mobile.
Chal Madhok ke pass!
1139 Emergency class meeting.
1145 Gadgets go into smelly places. (You wouldnt wanna me describe it)
1148 Contacts deleted. Phones made pavitra!
1205 Sir barges into the class. English teacher is out.
Your parents would be called. You wont get full marks in Maths, Science and Social.
You wont come to school except for practicals and pre-boards. Crap. He sounded serious.
1210 Bags, lunch boxes, desks, pants, underwears, socks, shoes
1220 Nothing found. We are too smart!
1225 Sir browse Mr K’s phone. Empty. Smart-ass took his memory card out!
1230 Sir looks fierce!
We await the zero period
1235 Planning and plotting
1245 Should we surrender?
1250 The white flag is raised
1305 Ericsson, Samsung, Nokia, Desi Phone (I’m not sure), iPod on the table
1306 Sir smiles. Kiska phone kachche main tha? (looks at Mr N)
Mere paas toh hai hi nahin!
Aapke pass kachcha nahin hai?
Laughter
Yeh 2 baje le lena (smiles again)
1307 Sighs…deep breathes, no calls at home, everyone is safe and sound.
1308 Go out in the field
1309 Rs 39000. Price for 1 hour of freedom!
We enjoy the sun after an eventful noon
1410 Someone is jealous. I promise to help.

PS: The names have not been cited to protect identities
PPS: If other versions of the story exist or if I have missed out on something, let me know.


So you got an Intel chipset and wondering whether FIFA 09 will work on it???

So you have an Intel chipset? You fear that FIFA 09 won’t work on it? You tried systemrequiremntslab.com to confirm your PC’s date with FIFA 09 and were turned down with the same red color marking the screen saying in bold letters – “FAIL”?

Well today I, for the first time, realized that systemrequiremntslab.com is not totally reliable. BEACUSE FIFA 09 WORKS ON INTEL!

Here is my PC’s configuration:

Processor: Intel Core 2 Duo E4400 @ 2.0 GHz
RAM : 1 GB DDR2
Chipset : Intel 82945G Express Chipset family

OS: Windows Vista Home Premium

And I didn’t use any modded drivers or software like 3D-Analyze or Swiftshader. Just download the latest drivers from Intel website and GAME ON.

Although it doesn’t play as FIFA 08 or EURO 2008, but on minimum settings, I was able to get a decent gameplay. Replays and free kicks are a bit choppy and players physique in the Tele camera looks like a deformed aliens’. But on the whole, a game you can enjoy playing.

So what are you waiting for?

LETS FIFA 09


Jesus Being Crucified (Offensive Joke)

How offensive is that?

Jesus has just been nailed to the cross and has begun to suffer from the wounds, A crowd has gathered to watch and sympathize with Him. As Jesus looks out over the gathering he calls to one of his apostle’s. “Paul… Paul,” He calls out. Paul hears his name and comes to the front of the gathering. “Yes Jesus, how I may serve you” he exclaims. Just then a guard comes up to Paul, cuts Paul’s right arm off with his sword, and throws him back into the crowd, saying “No one is allowed to speak with the prisoner!” Jesus once again calls his name. “Paul . . . Paul”, he calls. Paul, determined goes to the front of the gathering again. There he meets the same guard who this time cuts off the left arm, and both legs and throws him back into the crowd.

Jesus yells out once again, “Paul…Paul”. Paul, who is now lying on his back on the ground, attempts to roll to the front of the gathering. The guard seeing this determination and devotion finally weakens and decides to let Paul speak to Jesus. He goes over to Paul, picks him up and brings him to the front of the crowd. Paul, with tears in his eyes looks up to his saviour and speaks, “Yes Jesus, I am here. What is it I can do for you?” Jesus looks over the horizon and then to Paul and states,”Oh nothing. I just wanted to tell you that I could see your house from here!”


Why George Bush Quit Drinking?

Some say George W. Bush quit drinking because of this incident…

Back in his party days, Dubya got behind the wheel after a few too many. He started the car and stepped on the gas. He was driving for a while, when suddenly a white ghost face appeared in the window. George saw it and began screaming.

He stepped on the gas harder, but the face floated right in the window. George floored it – the speedometer read 110mph but the face did not disappear. A white hands gestured for him to roll down the window. Not knowing what else to do, he rolled it down slowly.

The wrinkled old face smiled and said, “Do you want help getting out of the mud?”


Exlcusive: GTA IV PC Cover

This is the cover of the highly anticipated PC version of Grand Theft Auto IV set to release on November 21 in North America


GTA IV Coming To PC This November

After all the speculation and finger crossing days, the word is finally making rounds on the Internet. Grand Theft Auto IV is coming to PC! Rockstar Games has confirmed the releasing dates to be 18 and 21 November in North America and Europe, respectively. The game would be similar to his console cousins but for a newly expanded multiplayer.

Grand Theft Auto IV, developed by Rockstar North, was previously released for the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 this past April.


United agree $56 fee for Berbatov

Man Utd’s pursuit of Dimitar Berbatov looks set after the Red Devils reportedly agreed a US$56 fee with Tottenham Hotspur.

The Bulgarian has long been on United’s radar after his stunning first season with Spurs two seasons ago. United were reportedly close to clinching Berbatov’s signature last summer, before Spurs nipped in to secure his long term future at White Hart Lane.

However, there seems to be no such reprieve for the North London side this time around, with Berba’s agent confirming that his client had received a formal offer from Sir Alex Ferguson’s United and has expressed a wish to leave Spurs.

Despite stating publicly that Berbatov is not for sale, Spurs chief Juande Ramos has privately conceded defeat in his bid to keep the Bulgarian for next season, with Tottenham already swooping in for Espanyol forward Luis Garcia and eyeing Euro 2008 star Andrei Arshavin as another potential replacement.

According to the English broadsheet The Daily Telegraph, a fee of US$56 million, subject to performance-related add-ons, has been agreed by both parties.

Although still a hefty price tag, the fee is actually US$4 million lower than the original bounty placed on the player. Despite this decrease, the proposed fee is still considered as a coup for Tottenham, with the club having previously rejected United’s first offer of US$40 million.

Originally posted at espnstar.com